Don’t Age; Phase!

Lunch conversations are often more meaningful than the food served. On Wednesday, I shared a noon-time meal with a 23-year-old friend, while yesterday, my lunch date was a 91-year-old former next-door neighbor. Despite the age span between my table mates, both nourished my appetite for living life to the fullest, which is something many people tend to push off of their plates.

Case in point: Two weeks ago, I did an intuitive consultation session for a recent college graduate. When I told him that he would be leading a political lobbying group, he responded, “Hey, I’ve thought about it, but I know I’m way too young for that.” Even though his idea was once registered, he had closed (slammed?) the door because of an age issue. Once we identified that his restrictions regarding age were part of his conditioning (“All my life, I’ve been told that I’m too young for this or that!”), he was able to see that the leadership position was attainable. And, I believe he’ll truly make an impact with government policies and actions.

Second example: I shared with a divorced woman in her late 60s that there would come a time when she would receive another marriage proposal. “That would be nice, but I’m too old for another walk down the aisle,” she laughed over the phone. Here, again, was something a person wanted (or at least, thought “would be nice”), but blamed her age as the reason for not being more receptive to an “I do” re-do. I asked her wasn’t marriage more about love and companionship, and not about the number of wrinkles and how long you’ve been receiving your Social Security benefits? “Well, when you put it that way, you got a point,” the client replied.

My friend Rona Barrett, the former entertainment reporter, who now heads her non-profit that focuses on programs and solutions for the elderly poor, has a perfect way of looking at aging: We don’t age; we phase. The main reason why I love that approach is because it applies to everyone, whether you’re an adolescent or a retiree. The types of responsibilities and experiences in which we engage fluctuate with our interests and capabilities. Meaning, throughout our lives, we’re presented with opportunities to expand our physical, mental, emotional and spiritual strengths.

As for my week’s lunch dates, they take advantage of “phasing.” The 23-year old man runs several business ventures and founded, Positive Young People, a non-profit focusing on AIDS prevention. And, as for the 91-year-old; she’s currently in her second month of Spanish lessons! Muy Bien!

Love and light,


12 thoughts on “Don’t Age; Phase!

  1. Rosemary H Carter

    l firmly believe in “phasing” and attempt to practice it with each passing year. Thanks for reminding us that we can continue to live fully even as we age.

  2. Joan Kelly

    I love the idea for phasing – a more fluid concept of stepping into and owning new chapters in your life. It almost takes on a forward motion to become rather than to age and let time pass you by. Thanks for inspiring!!! Joan.

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